“Here we be floating in space deliberately looking for a shark called Big Mamma. It’s like we be ringing the dinner bell, and we be the main course,” Kildo muttered under his breath as he stared out into the vast oblivion of space. He watched a peaceful pod of space whales swim along the port side of the Space Dragon.
“Char!” Charmander chirped and pointed to the right.
Turning his attention to the starboard side, nine brown scavvers swam parallel to them in space. Ten feet in length, they were one-eyed, shark-like creatures with mouths large enough to swallow a person whole. From below the ship, another creature rose in the middle of the pack, ‘Big Mamma’. Fifteen feet long, her skin was as dark as night and resembled space itself, including white spots similar to distant stars along her length.
“It’s about damn time,” Scomatch clapped and began casting, Fireball. A bright streak arched out into the middle of the swimming sharks and centered on Big Mamma. A roar of flames engulfed most of the creatures, with five of them charred to a crisp as their lifeless husks floated on with their momentum. The four, including Big Mamma, all turned and darted toward the Space Dragon’s deck.
As the first brown scavver approached, Kai lunged with Wave. It went into the creature’s massive mouth. The long reach of the trident was the only thing preventing him from being swallowed whole. It clamped down. Its intent was stopped as the paladin’s armored forearm was also bit.
“The nine hells!” Kildo cursed as another of the brown scavvers mouths jutted out. It would encircle around his entire body.
“Kildo just got swallowed!” Guo Gan called out. The shark-like creature thrashed around where the dwarf cleric was a moment before.
“I be all right!” Kildo called back as he emerged from behind a barrel. A long gash was along the dwarf’s plate armor.
“I swear you had just got eaten!” Guo Gan yelled. Distracted, the monk failed to see a brown scavver swim and attempt to swallow the elf. Thrusting with Qiekamis, the point rammed straight through the roof of its mouth and into its brain. However, Guo Gan suffered a bite in its death throws.
Disengaging from the first brown scavver, Kai avoided an opportunity attack from the creatures. The paladin charged and unleashed the Wave motion gun. The points of the trident pierced into the charred gills of Big Mamma. The weapon sunk deep as powerful radiant damage blasted into its side. The massive shark thrashed around wildly as it fell dead to the deck. Its weight then slid off and drifted into space.
“Ha! Big Mamma wasn’t so tough,” Kai said.
The paladin was distracted celebrating his win over the enormous scavver. Kildo intercepted the first brown scavver as it attempted to swim after Kai. Bashing with his war hammer, it crunched into the cartilage. Smashing with his shield to knock it away, the dwarf was stopped cold due to the shark’s enormous weight.
A moment later, a four-inch diameter orb filled with acid splashed across the scavver’s side from Scomatch. It thrashed and reeled in pain.
The remaining shark-like creatures snapped at Kildo, Kai, and Guo Gan, but wounded, their aim was off, and all missed.
Six brown scavvers floated nearby, along with Big Mamma. A spray of blood surrounded the corpses. They’d need to mop up these three, and then they could return to Topolah’s Tower.
“Char!”
Turning at Scomatch’s familiar alarm, Kildo saw two more fifteen-foot-long scavver dart up from below the Space Dragon. Like Big Mamma, their skin was as dark as night and resembled space itself, including white spots similar to distant stars along their length. They each had swallowed the corpse of a brown scavver whole. It was then that he realized they hadn’t killed Big Mamma.
A colossal shadow, like an ever-growing eclipse, fell along the ship. Slowing peering up, a titanic scavver swam in the distance. Easily twice the length of the Space Dragon, this scavver had black jet skin with a single large gigantic eye that glowed a menacing red. The beam turned and focused on their ship.
“Oi, we be needing a bigger boat. I think Big Mamma just showed up!” Kildo called out.
“I killed Big Mamma,” Kai retorted.
“You be killing A big mamma. Not THE Big Mamma,” Kildo replied.
The second night scavver’s seized Kai with an open-mouth strike. The paladin was swallowed whole. The other new arrival darted after Scomatch. The halfling dove out of the way behind a mast, and while biting, his actions kept him from being eaten as a tasty snack.
Rushing over to the second night scavver that swallowed Kai, Guo Gan unleashed a fury of attacks with Qiekamis, his fists, and his feet as his blood fury tattoos ignited across his body trying to slay the creature.
Movement was visible from within. The prongs of Wave pierced through the skin from the inside. They ripped downward as an ichor-covered Kai emerged, killing the beast. Flinging shark goo, Kai yelled, moving past Guo Gan, “Get to Scomatch before they turn him into space chow!” The paladin stabbed the first night scavver, trying to eat the Scomatch snack.
Realizing the real Big Mamma was about to descend on them, Kildo chanted and cast Bless. Each of the party members glowed briefly from the protective spell. He followed Kai toward Scomatch to provide another target for the night scavvers instead of the halfling.
Scoffing, Scomatch called out, “Why are you all running toward me? So, I can protect you all?”
“Just be killing them before we need to be fishing you out of one of these guppy’s mouths,” Kildo yelled.
“One fish fry coming up!” Weaving his hands, Scomatch cast, Firefall. The three brown scavvers were incinerated instantly, while the last night scavver was burnt along one side. It snapped at the halfling but was partially immobilized as its charred scales ripped.
“Everyone, we can cut through its thinner skin easier from the inside!” Kai called out. The paladin began running toward the last night scavver. He leaped into the air and was swallowed whole.
“What’s he doing!?” Guo Gan shouted.
“He be saying it’s hide be thinner from the inside,” Kildo called back.
“That doesn’t make any sense. The skin will have the same level of thickness from the inside as the outside,” Scomatch yelled.
The three prongs of Wave burst through the gills of the night scavver. Ripping downward, Kai pushed his body through, slaying the shark.
Snorting, Kildo said, “Maybe he be right.”
Flinging more goo, Kai ran across the deck to the aft of the ship and thrusted Wave into the snout of Big Mamma. The points barely punctured its cartilage, and radiant damage burst down the length of the trident.
“Go get him Kai!” Guo Gan cheered on.
“It’s female,” Scomatch corrected. “Hence the name, Big Mamma. Get it right!”
“My whole life has been nothing but one correction for gender miss-assignment after another,” Guo Gan said as Qiekamis bashed into Big Mamma. It dented the cartilage where it struck as his blood fury tattoos ignited and drained her life force.
Kildo realized taking down Big Mamma would require more than poking it with sticks. The creature was twice as large as the Space Dragon. Chanting, a vertical column of divine fire roared from the heavens and blasted into the top of the gargantuan scavver. While burning a hole deep into its cartilage, it seemed only to annoy the beast.
“It’s been a while since I’ve had some good sashimi,” Scomatch said as he cast Disintegrate. A thin green ray shot from his hands, blowing a chunk from Big Mamma’s dorsal fin.
The titanic scavver immediately turned and darted forward. Mouth opening wide, it passed the deck of the Space Dragon. Guo Gan attempted to dive out of the way, but it was too extensive and swallowed the elf.
“Its skin is thinner from the inside!” Kai shouted to the engulfed monk. Wave glowed from Kildo’s bless spell as the paladin stabbed Big Mamma with the trident as it passed, causing a slight tear along its length.
“The nine hells!” Kildo cursed. He could see the monk struggling inside the creature. He was still alive for the moment and fighting from the bulges. He called down another flame strike of divine power into the back of the colossal scavver.
“Why won’t this thing die?” Scomatch lamented as a green disintegration ray blew off another chunk of Big Mamma’s back fin.
Kai continued to stab at the gargantuan scavver, leaving deep holes wherever Wave pierced it, as radiant damage burned its cartilage skin.
Big Mamma turned and headed for the ship’s deck.
“Boys, oh boys! I think Big Mamma is coming back for its noon feeding!” Kildo yelled as another flame strike rained down from the heavens. Seemingly immune to pain, Big Mamma continued to take the party’s massive damage.
Scomatch aimed his finger and cast, Disintegrate. The green beam shot straight into Big Mamma’s eye. Its soulless pitch-black pupil exploded in ichor and gore. “This fish and chips ain’t be dying!”
Going into a solid stance, Kai braced the butt of Wave against the Space Dragon’s deck. Big Mamma’s one eye spotted him and turned, heading straight for the paladin. “I’m the dread pirate Kai. My wrath is as massive and treacherous as the sea. I’ve traveled through space and time. Give me your best shot, Big Mamma, as I hear sushi is a delicacy…in Hell!”
Opening its maw wider that Kai was tall, Big Mamma’s jaw snapped down over the paladin. Wave’s points rammed into the roof of the scavver’s mouth. Radiant damage course up the length of the trident. Kai stayed inside Big Mamma, holding Wave vertically. The more the scavver tried to swallow the triton, the deeper the trident’s prongs sank. The creature seemed not to care or feel pain as its maw closed.
Kildo cast, Insect Plague. Reality ripped as a swarm of biting, stinging insects began gnawing away at Big Mamma’s wounds.
“Kai, do you see Guo Gan inside?” Scomatch asked.
“No!”
“Hold its mouth open!” Scomatch bellowed.
“What do you think I’m doing!?” Kai bellowed back, straining his muscles as Wave’s prongs sunk deeper, as the scavver bit down.
“Smile you son of a B…!” Scomatch yelled as a bright ball of fire streaked past Kai and down Big Mamma’s throat. An eruption followed as large chunks flew into the air and outer space. Blood spray was everywhere. The front part of the titanic scavver was in bits and pieces. As its carcass fell off the Space Dragon, the form of Guo Gan appeared stationary from within. His skin was beat-red from stomach acid, and he had Qiekamis vertical, preventing Big Mamma’s stomach muscles from crushing the monk within.
Recovering from the battle, smaller scavvers swarmed in and fed on Big Mamma’s remains. They didn’t seem interested in the Space Dragon or the party.
Scomatch began searching the deck and shifting through the scattered, bloody remains of Big Mamma.
“What are you looking for?” Guo Gan asked, wiping stomach acid from his body.
“Parts of its fin. I’m going to make soup out of it. Puts hair on your feet.”
Shrugging his shoulders in understanding stroking his braided beard, Kildo bent and picked up one of its teeth. It was massive and the size of his hand. The perfect proof showing the demise of Big Mamma.
***
“I was watching through my telescope. I knew you could do it. What wonderful work,” Topolah said as she examined the enormous tooth from Big Mamma. “Thank you, thank you. My birds thank you too.”
“You are welcome. Now, can you help us exit this sphere?” Kai asked.
“Yes, yes. However, Commodore Krux said something about forming an armada. I do know someone who would be interested in working with you,” Topolah explained.
“Who?” Guo Gan questioned.
“Is it Shatterkeel?” Kildo asked.
“No. His name is Gargenhale. He doesn’t like astral elves, and even better, he has a small fleet of vessels. However, it’d be better if I went and vouch for you. He can be temperamental at times,” Topolah said. “Besides, he’s way out at the edge of the sphere.”
“Of course he is. Thanks for all the help lady,” Scomatch said sarcastically, as a pelican pooped on the halfling’s shoulder.
“You’re welcome!” Topolah said with genuine enthusiasm. “Oh, I hope you don’t mind me bringing some of my birds with me. They get lonely with me gone.”
***
“WrrreeeeeEEEEE… WrrreeeeeEEEEE… WrrreeeeeEEEEE!”
Kildo’s eyes opened and he saw a panel next to his door flashing bright red in warning. Rising from his hammock and exiting his quarters, he had to shoo a few of Topolah’s birds as he made his way to the Space Dragon's bridge. Watching the monitor, in the distance was a dust cloud signaling the edge of their sphere. However, they were entering the debris of drifting wreckage of several ships.
Commodore Krux was looking through a spyglass. “I see the remains of a nautiloid, a star moth, and several other ships that I can’t tell due to extensive damage.”
“What be a star moth?” Kildo asked.
“It's a type of spelljammer that the astral elves use,” Commodore Krux explained.
“May I be seeing that?” Kildo asked, pointing to the spyglass. Handing it to the dwarf, he peered out toward the cloud of debris. He saw fragments of furniture, oars, weapons, and numerous broken items floating in the void. He then noticed a couple of drifting corpses. Each had grievous wounds, and it seemed like the life had been sucked out of them like he saw the crystalline vines do back on Earth.
As the Space Dragon continued to move through the debris field, lighting flashed through some dense blue and purple clouds. It illuminated a spelljammer galleon ship. On it, ghastly mariners stood staring at them with unblinking eyes. One stepped forward, likely the captain, with wild white hair with a barreled mask covering his face. His left hand detached at the wrist and then creepily skittered up his arm, like a spider, to his shoulder. The thing then waived with its fingers.
“What in the nine hells be them?” Kildo asked.
“Vamp-pirates,” Commodore Krux spat.